i FeEl Im So SmaLL iN ThiS BiG World...

was studying at mac wif ah wee today before training...we had a hearty conversation during our lunch break..it sets me thinking bout wat i wan to be next time when i come out to work.
there's so manay things tt i wanna be like a teacher?a banker?a customer relationship officer?a singer?an actor?and guess wat?i even thought of being a DJ...Muahaha...but i hav to narrow it down n be realistic.i cant hav all e things in e world for myself?n juz feeling tt life is so so diff compared to days in sceondary.where im still a teen,im so sheltered and everything....but wat ever...

we went for training after tt...it was great.can feel like im more part of e team than before...maybe ppl r starting to get used to my presence?hee..and i feel good after e physical training...dunno y too,thou it was rather tough?but during e games and drills...i didn really play well and do well.felt quite lousy..its like since sec i've been e better ones but here,im e bottom few...even running im e last!feel really low in my esteem..tt's y everyting during training my face will hung low.juz feel tt im not good enough...i juz hav to get my ego out n be humble,admit tt im bad and start building my foundation properly.realli hope tt i can not only improve and contribut to e team rather than hai4 them but also feel more gelled wif e team...

juz pray tt next training i can put in my best adn improve?i dunn like e feel of being lousy...i'd always feel liek crying but i know tt wun solve anything.i juz have to work towards e goal...